Overrated

Overrate: : to rate, value, or estimate too highly; Function: transitive verb

Overrated: SUVs, men in tight girl-pants, having steady employment; conjugal visits (No, I’ve never had one, but I can only assume that they’re not all they’re cracked up to be.); cats, cell phones, silk flowers; Quentin Tarantino (Sorry, man.); colored push pins – they have a function, they don’t need to be pretty, too; birthday cake, gift cards – if you can’t be bothered to get me something you actually want me to have, forget it (unless it’s worth eleventy-million dollars), Barry Manilow; iPods (I just put this in there to make me feel better that I don’t have one.), doing anything at all before 8 a.m., ever; the price of oil and the price of rice in China, fake Christmas trees that have no pine smell; socialized healthcare, wine because it gives me a terrible headache; religion, political correctiness – Why does it have to be political correctness? What about human correctness? And, who the hell determines what’s “correct” anyway?; dodgeball and other pointless sports; transvestites because they confuse me; turtlenecks – they’re just not confortable; a satisfied mind and a lonely heart; kid’s athletics with no winners – Even kids have to learn that sometimes you win, sometimes you lose and that mediocrity is not the standard; yellow, and banannas because they’re just kinda gross, despite the fact that bananna flavored things are great.

Underrated: receiving hand-written mail (It just makes me happy.), walking in the rain, or walking anywhere for that matter; snow days, good meals, warm coats, old friends; long, soft kisses to the tempo of Damien Rice; 80′s hair bands, Phil Collins, sunrise at the beach, getting older and wiser; cowboy boots; being too legit, too legit to quit (hey, hey); crying when it really hurts, a good musical, old movies, telling people you love them just because you do; wearing a helmet for your protection, and for the safety of others; the dark, that movie the Fantastic 4 (Shut up, I really liked it.), riding back roads just because you’ve got nothing better to do; actually having nothing better to do; staying in bed all day, feeling safe, going to the Circus and/or pretending you’re in the Circus, open flames; QWERTY (It would take me hours to type this without it, maybe.); diversity, freedom of speech even for really stupid people; love notes; Athiests 4 Jesus (Just think about it.); that fresh, clean feeling; reading the Classics, the importance of stem cell research, living well and not just living long; facing your mortality in order to feel alive; banjo music; being yourself; having the technology and freedom to blog about stuff that nobody will read or really cares about anyway; and, last, but not least, punctuation and spacing becausewherewouldwebewithoutit